Today I went to a new doctor, regular physician. My blood pressure is up just a bit, wasn’t surprised. First he explained the practice, then asked me what my biggest concern was at this time. The alien. We talked briefly about it, and he said we would go back and discuss it more in detail. Then he rattled off symptoms and told me to stop him if I had one. Generalized stuff, like what you normally check yes or no on a new patient sheet. So, I stopped him on hot flashes, night sweats, chest pains, back pain, bowel issues, etc. While we were discussing each one, and me relaying my pre- menopause screen, my cholesterol, my anxiety, the back pain and the alien, I saw something for the first time from a doctor. (Yeah that was a run on sentence.)
Instead of looking at each symptom and trying to figure it out, he looked at all the symptoms, piecing things together. First the back pain, bowel issues, fear, body aches, the alien all seemed to go together. Then he said are you sure you don’t have more anxiety than just every now and then when something like the alien arrives. I drive on the feeders, I don’t use elevators, I avoid bridges, avoid driving in storms. He thinks that maybe the night sweats, hot flashes are also symptoms of anxiety. Maybe instead of having something to settle a panic attack, maybe we should try something that would prevent attacks from evening happening. He also said I may have a touch of OCD. Great! Labels. I have to admit it has been a struggle but I have been dealing with it, which in turn stresses me more out and just increases the anxiety. Like, I may not have even had what we thought might have been a mini stroke if I was treated for the anxiety. Of course, I voiced my concern, about feeling like a zombie on drugs. I don’t like it and would rather have bursts of anxiety in between great times. He said that is not the goal. A medicine that works should not make you feel like a zombie. We discussed my post pardum depression, and he told me to stop associating that experience with treating my anxiety. He told me to get all the prescription names from my previous doctor so we could evaluate and definitely not use those. I have an appointment with him next Friday and we will work on the anxiety. Although I probably will never be able to bungee jump.
The alien. He believed me. I told him in detail what I have been going through for a year and the surgery. He was appalled at the previous surgeon , even my previous physician for that matter. We couldn’t get it to go out in his office, but we tried. I even moved furniture around in his office. He said I need to see a surgeon to get to the bottom of it and fix it. He said he knows a great surgeon who not only is excellent in his surgeries, but listens to his patients. He won’t stop until the patient feels good and the problem is fixed. He will call the surgeon to let him know what has been going on and I will try to get a copy of the original MRI and make an appointment.
Basically I still don’t know exactly what kind of hernia I have or if there are also other issues, but I feel like I have someone on my side and won’t blow me off.
I called my previous physician this morning at 11:17 A.M. and left a message via voice mail to his medical assistant. I requested a list of previous prescribed anxiety and depression medications and a copy of the MRI of the umbilical hernia. I stated that I need this as soon as possible. Call me back and let me know what I need to do to obtain these items. It is 7:52 pm, no call back yet. I have a feeling I should go to the practice with written request and hand it to him tomorrow.
I got a ton of blood taken from me today, it would have been so much better if it was by Eric Northman in True Blood. Just saying.
One day at a time. At least now I’m moving forward and not two steps back.
